An Apology Letter to My Body

Dear body,

I’m sorry that this island life is not allowing you to live your best life. I recognize that you’re taking a hit with each day that passes here, and I only hope that I can get you back to health in a few weeks. Just hang in there, it’s almost over. I need to apologize for a few things-

To my feet: I’m sorry that you look like wet bars of soap that have been dropped on the ground multiple times on a dirty shower floor. Between being barefoot and damp all the time and walking on dirt and sand, you’re really a lost cause at this point. I’m also sorry if that description is graphic but I keep it real.

To my stomach: I’m sorry that I’ve fed you 13 times the amount of carbs that you’re used to and have eaten a days worth of protein in the time that I’ve been here. I promise to never have white rice again after this.

To my hair: I’m sorry that I’ve ripped out 3/4 of you in an effort to comb out sun, sand and sea water and that I will have to cut off the last 1/4 of you when I get home because of how dead you are. Also sorry that you look like you belong on a dirty hippie.

To my mind: I’m sorry that I’ve only allowed you to turn off for four hours at night and that you live in constant paranoia of bugs and creatures crawling on you. I’m also sorry that I’ve forced you to do Fahrenheit to Celsius, ringgit to dollars, and meters to feet conversions constantly each day, putting you into overdrive.

To my liver: I’m sorry that I’ve filled you with cheap Malaysian beer and whiskey as opposed to the classy Bud Light and Smirnoff that you’re used to. You’ll be back to the boujee life soon.

To my skin: You don’t get an apology you lookin bronzed as hell.

We’re in this together!!

Xoxo Kristen